The Bowl of Saki Commentary

The supreme idea of friendship is that God is the friend, not a friend, but the friend. In other words, there is not friendship in any sense of separation, but in the sense of union, as of lovers. The wrong view of friendship is to think of it, to consider it at all with the discriminating mind. In this case, there is no real bond, there is attachment of nufs, and although no doubt this has an element of truth in it-no doubt there is a real bond between the two hearts—yet it is covered by the idea of self.

It is this which causes consideration of friend as "other" instead of regarding friend as "self." Consequently there is a line of demarcation caused by this discrimination, from the action of the nufs in making the heart-love submissive to the mind-thought. Therefore, the friend is not a confidant, but an acquaintance even when there is harmony of feeling.

And by the same law, when there is not harmony of feeling, one would consider the acquaintance as a stranger, in that there would be no confidence, no familiarity. Such a one is so under the sway of nufs that nothing can be done until the karmic activity brings such pain that one begins to awaken. And what is the cause of the pain? It is the breaking of a habit. This habit has made a groove on the mind and now that the groove cannot contain the life force, another groove is being made from the new experience, and this brings the pain. But the real pain is the separation of the heart from its beloved which is very great in this type of person. Consequently when such a one suffers it seems that the pain is greater than with anybody else.